The Power of YOUR Word

The Power of YOUR Word

When it came to deciding on the theme for this months blog it was pretty had to be about LOVE.

Valentines Day is a big deal in the month of February.  Obviously, it has a huge commercial element to it and it is personal choice whether you opt in or opt out of all the commercialisation around the day.  Whether you are in or out your can't deny at the crux of all the fanfare is the message of LOVE. 

And so it felt completely right to have a conversation around love this month, but specifically around love of oneself and how we can introduce or maybe bring more 'Self Love' & 'Self Compassion' into our lives.  And the ripple effect this will have on our relationship with ourself and others.

Lets start with the mindset shift...

I don't know about you, but my memory of growing up as a kid in the 80's was loving yourself was an act of selfishness.  Conversations with the sentence "oh she loves herself" were not said in a favourable way. Confidence or cockiness was seen as a negative and as a result many people dimmed their light to fit in and be accepted.  They gave up on the opprtunity of being their true authentic selves for the sake of others.

So fast forward 40 years, hindsight plus social media (yes there are benefits) has shown us there is a better way, a better way of treating others and most importantly a better way of treating ourselves.  When we get out of our heads, and establish a better mind, body & soul connection we are open to love.  Love of others & love of ourselves.   

How I hear you ask...

When I thought about where to start my thoughts kept returning to a book I am reading this month called 'The Four Agreements', written by Don Miguel Ruiz.  To summarise the author tells us The Four Agreements are a set of principles that can help us break free from self-limiting beliefs and create a life of joy and authenticity. 

The agreement which I believe is fundamental in allowing us bring in and practice self love & self compassion in our lives is Agreement No. 1 'Be Impeccable with your word'....

In every day interactions we are presented with opportunities to be impeccable with our word.  But for now I want to focus on our inner dialogue, how the words we use to speak to ourselves & our tone of voice massively impact our opinion of ourselves.  We all have our inner voice, our inner critic.

Who is this Inner Critic...

The inner critic is that negative voice inside your head that tells you you're not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough. It's the voice that highlights your flaws and magnifies your mistakes. It can be relentless, constantly undermining your self-esteem and holding you back from reaching your full potential.

You will have heard the phrase speak to yourself like you would a good friend.  But how often do we take this advice.  We know that our words can become a powerful force for good, uplifting ourselves, but yet we are conditioned to berate and critise ourselves. 

Your Inner Critic might be saying.....'You're not a good mother', 'Your not good enough at your job', 'Your a fake', 'Your not a good sister, daughter etc etc, 'Your fat', ' Your lazy' and it goes on and on and on.  You need to know you are capable of achieving great things and your inner critic does not define you.

Start small but be consistent!

  • Practice mindfulness, Cultivate present-moment awareness to catch yourself when you're about to let that critical inner voice speak up. Take a deep breath and choose a more loving compassionate inner response.
  • Be patient and compassionate, Remember that change takes time. Be gentle with yourself as you navigate this transformative process and celebrate your progress along the way.
  • In moments of chaos you could write yourself some kind, understanding words of comfort.  Let yourself know that you care about yourself, adopting a gentle reassuring tone.
  • Create a list of your favourite self compassion & loving affirmations such as I am worth loving, I am good enough & I love being me.

The Benefits...

Not only will you enjoy and experience the benefits of a self compassion practice, but there will be a ripple effect out to all areas of your life.  Benefits such as greater resilience, increased self worth, a proactive attitude, a better and healthier body image, decreased anxiety and fear of failure and an ability to create stable lasting relationships.

So my message to you today is this, YOU are deserving of all the LOVE.  Bring it back to who you are, remember what lights you up, be brave and be your true authentic self.  

In the words of Louise Hay.  'It does not matter what other people say or do, what matters is what I choose to believe about myself"

Have it on repeat.......I LOVE myself exactly as I am!

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